Sexual Roleplay for Married Couples

بِسۡمِ ٱللهِ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ

The following is taken from “Sexual Roleplay by Married Couples” by Shaykh Nur ad-Din Abu ‘Ubadah ‘Ali ibn Juma’ah. 

Some married couples like to do some sexual fantasies so they role play the master and the slave, and this sex act could contain some sadism so one party can get hurt.  So, is this sexual fantasy prohibited? 

Sadism indicates the tendency to derive pleasure and sexual gratification from inflicting pain, suffering or humiliation on others.  This terminology was first used by the French writer, Marquis de Sade who was known for his erotic and controversial literature which included a lot of violent sexual content.  It is well known that hurting the other party whether psychologically or physically in the sexual relationship or in any other relationship is legally prohibited.  Allah (s.w.t.) Says: 

سُوۡرَةُ الاٴعرَاف

قُلۡ إِنَّمَا حَرَّمَ رَبِّىَ ٱلۡفَوَٲحِشَ مَا ظَهَرَ مِنۡہَا وَمَا بَطَنَ وَٱلۡإِثۡمَ وَٱلۡبَغۡىَ بِغَيۡرِ ٱلۡحَقِّ وَأَن تُشۡرِكُواْ بِٱللَّهِ مَا لَمۡ يُنَزِّلۡ بِهِۦ سُلۡطَـٰنً۬ا وَأَن تَقُولُواْ عَلَى ٱللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعۡلَمُونَ (٣٣) 

Say: The things that my Lord hath indeed Forbidden are: shameful deeds, whether open or secret; sins and trespasses against truth or reason; assigning of partners to Allah, for which He has Given no authority; and saying things about Allah of which you have no knowledge. (Surah al-A’araf:33) 

The Prophet (s.a.w.) also said, “Do not inflict harm” and preserving one’s life is one of the major objectives of the shari’ah.  The renowned scholars believe that the shari’ah with all its variant rulings revolve around preserving the five major objectives of it, which are preserving life, religion, dignity, mind and possession.  It was narrated through ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbas (r.a.) that the Prophet (s.a.w.) said during the last sermon in pilgrimage, “O People, your blood, money, and honours are forbidden.”  This is recorded in Swahih al-Bukhari. 

As for engaging in sexual acts in any position that the couple agree on is lawful as Allah (s.w.t.) Says: 

سُوۡرَةُ البَقَرَة

نِسَآؤُكُمۡ حَرۡثٌ۬ لَّكُمۡ فَأۡتُواْ حَرۡثَكُمۡ أَنَّىٰ شِئۡتُمۡ‌ۖ وَقَدِّمُواْ لِأَنفُسِكُمۡ‌ۚ ... (٢٢٣) 

Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will. but do some good act for your souls beforehand... (Surah al-Baqarah:223) 

All sexual positions are permissible except for anal sex and also engaging in sex during the wife’s menstrual period is deemed impermissible.  Allah (s.w.t.) Says: 

سُوۡرَةُ البَقَرَة

وَيَسۡـَٔلُونَكَ عَنِ ٱلۡمَحِيضِ‌ۖ قُلۡ هُوَ أَذً۬ى فَٱعۡتَزِلُواْ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فِى ٱلۡمَحِيضِ‌ۖ وَلَا تَقۡرَبُوهُنَّ حَتَّىٰ يَطۡهُرۡنَ‌ۖ ... (٢٢٢) 

They ask thee concerning women’s courses. Say: They are a hurt and a pollution; so keep away from women in their courses, and do not approach them until they are clean ... (Surah al-Baqarah:222) 

Therefore, all sexual acts are permissible except also for acts that are forced by one party on the other which might lead to repulsion and repugnance.